Dear Future Self,
For when you find that you are back to square one:
Every feeling, every hunch and every emotion is valid. There are days when you’ll be disappointed by the smallest of things. In the numerous times that that has happened to me, I have always negated those feelings because I always told myself the following things:
1.) You don’t have the right to feel what you feel. Why don’t you try to appreciate things more.
2.) People are right. You are overly dramatic. And that’s a bad thing, because that means you’re weak.
3.) You’re just not working hard enough. That’s why you’re sad. You don’t deserve to be where you are.
4.) I need someone to tell me that I’m doing okay. But, I don’t want to act on this because I should be the one to validate myself. I am independent.
And, once and for all, I am writing this down so I won’t forget. I am shutting these thoughts down.
1.) You have to understand that whatever you feel is what you feel. Thinking that it is invalid only leave questions unanswered. Ask yourself why you’re feeling this. Calm down. Face your feelings. It’s not a matter of appreciating things. You have to start accepting that you are different. And sometimes it may be bad, but most of the time it’s just you being you. Stop, Breathe, Calm Down and when you feel you can analyze it, analyze it.
2.) You don’t need to prove anything to anyone. Live life to your own standards. Everyone is different, we cope in different ways. You are not dramatic. ( If you’re not convinced, go back to # 1 ) You are not weak. And you know what, the good thing about weaknesses is that you can work on those. Knowing and challenging yourself is key.
3.) I don’t know what your situation is ( and why you’re going back to this letter ) but, always remember that while having this kind of may motivate you at first, you have to know your limits. Bringing yourself down will only demotivate you in the long run. Instead of thinking this way, think about what you can do about the situation. For example, instead of thinking statement number 3, say to yourself I can be better than this.
4.) While it’s good that you’re establishing your independence ( you go, gurl/boy! ) , don’t ever think that isolating yourself from friends or family will help. You’re not necessarily drawing strength from them, but they can help you analyze your thought process.
Anyway, the bottom line is, it’s okay to feel sad, it’s okay to feel small. But, you have to remember that changing perspectives help. And also, YOU DO YOU! As long as it’s not hurting anyone, do what makes you feel golden.